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Chip and Cern Show

Mar 30, 2017

This episode got sideways quick. Many topics covered and none of them related. From drinking beer,  to drunken stories of youth, Cern’s 30th birthday party, to getting older, and finally ending up with the biggest penis sizes in the animal kingdom. Strap in folks cause this one is a doozie. 
Chip has noticed that Target is making a play towards the craft beer area and Chip snagged some New Belgium Dayblazer Easy Going Ale in preparation for a weekend of boozing, golf, boozing and more general slap dickery with the likes of Joe, Dana, Cern, Tony and a few other misfits. 
When Chip and Cern first started drinking they were big into the Fat Tire and really didn’t like IPAs. They also went through a Guinness phase, then a hard liquor phase where martinis, gin and tonics and now to IPAs.
If Cern had his pick, money is no object, would have some 21st Amendment Brew Free or DIE. Chip more drinks to the season, occasion or meal. 
For Cern’s 30th birthday there was some golfing. Chip and Cern don’t golf, but once a year. Two weekends back to back golfing is a rare feat for Chip and Cern lately. When you tee off at 9am, you start drinking early, so you can’t hit the hard stuff early. This is the reason for Chip getting the Dayblazer beer from Target. The day was amazing for golf just over 70 degrees, combined with day drinking, no real food didn’t bode well for a mid-day podcast. After golf everyone hit the club house for a round of beers. Cern’s work friends were there, so one round turned to two and that really sunk  the podcast hopes.
Now onto day drinking talk. When Chip, Cern, Tony and Chip’s wife would go to noon Giants game they would start drinking at like 10am and then hit the bars after. Chip never thinks he was good at day drinking. 
Moves onto some bachelor party prep. Stay Boy Dana is getting hitched in a few weeks, so there was some party planning and talk of Vegas. Chip’s last bachelor party was in Scottsdale for Spring Training. 
The plan for Dana’s Bachelor Party is golf in the morning, watching some March Madness, lunch/dinner, then to hit the casino for some gambling. 
Now that they are getting older Chip is complaining about being sore from golf and gaining weight from drinking booze. 
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Now some drinking stories of yesteryear pop up. Tony’s 22nd birthday, during the Guinness phase of Chip and Cern. They went out to “only have a couple” of beers and you know how that story goes. Started at 6p we got booted out of the bar at last call. Then a drunken stopper to Mel’s, booting into urinals and a crazy cab ride, ending up with pushing Cern back to Chip’s house in a homeless person’s shopping cart. 
Now the talk goes back to Dana’s bachelor party plans. March Madness viewing which will be very exciting since Chip and Cern don’t watch much basketball. 
Now Chip and Cern are trying to remember the story of why Chip was pushing Cern home in the shopping cart. 
Next Chip and Cern discuss Cern’s 30th birthday pranks that were pulled on Joe and Dana. Then there is some speculation and planning on who will “got got” for Dana’s bachelor party round of golf. Should Chip and Cern make Joe an ally? Should they all gang up on Tony? Stay tuned to find out.
Bringing the podcast home with a real doozie of a topic is how big an elephant’s penis is. This then brings Cern to look up other large penises which was delivered to some very sexy music. 
What are some of your crazy drunken stories?  Let us know of Twitter, FB or even Instagram. 
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